Ex- English leader Lewis Moody has revealed he has been found to have motor neurone disease and acknowledged he cannot yet face the full ramifications of the muscle-degenerating condition that took the lives of fellow rugby players Doddie Weir and Rob Burrow.
The middle-aged sportsman, who was part of the World Cup champion 2003 side and lifted numerous English and European titles with Leicester, gave an interview to BBC Breakfast a fortnight after learning he has the condition.
"There's an element of looking the future in the face and not wanting to completely absorb that at the present time," he said.
"It isn't that I fail to comprehend where it's progressing. We grasp that. But there is certainly a reluctance to face what's ahead for now."
Moody, conversing together with his wife Annie, explains instead he feels "calm" as he concentrates on his present welfare, his family and planning ahead for when the illness worsens.
"Possibly that's surprise or maybe I process things in another way, and once I have the information, it's more manageable," he added.
Initial Indications
Moody found out he had MND after observing some weakness in his shoulder area while working out in the gym.
After physical therapy failed to improve the condition, a set of scans indicated nerve cells in his central nervous system had been damaged by MND.
"You receive this condition identification of MND and we're rightly quite affected about it, but it's so strange because I feel like nothing's wrong," he remarked.
"I don't sense sick. I don't sense poorly
"The signs I have are rather minimal. I have some muscle deterioration in the fingers and the shoulder.
"I continue to be competent to performing whatever I want. And optimistically that will continue for as long as is attainable."
Illness Development
MND can develop swiftly.
As per the organization MND Association, the illness takes the lives of a third of people within a twelve months and over half within 24 months of detection, as ingestion and breathing become more difficult.
Therapy can only delay deterioration.
"It's not me that I feel sad for," stated an affected Moody.
"There's sadness around having to break the news to my mum - as an sole offspring - and the implications that has for her."
Personal Impact
Talking from the household with his wife and their canine companion by his side, Moody was overwhelmed by feeling when he discussed breaking the news to his sons - 17-year-old Dylan and 15-year-old Ethan - the traumatic news, commenting: "It was the most difficult thing I've ever had to do."
"These are two excellent boys and that was pretty devastating," Moody remarked.
"We positioned ourselves on the couch in tears, Ethan and Dylan both embraced in each other, then the dog bounded over and started removing the tears off our faces, which was rather funny."
Moody said the focus was being in the moment.
"There exists no cure and that is why you have to be extremely strongly directed on just welcoming and appreciating everything now," he commented.
"As my wife mentioned, we've been very blessed that the sole determination I made when I concluded playing was to allocate as much duration with the kids as attainable. We can't reclaim those periods back."
Athlete Link
Top-level athletes are disproportionately influenced by MND, with studies indicating the rate of the illness is up to 600% elevated than in the general population.
It is believed that by reducing the O2 obtainable and causing harm to motor neurone cells, frequent, intense physical activity can trigger the illness in those inherently predisposed.
Rugby Professional Life
Moody, who earned 71 England appearances and traveled with the British and Irish Lions in New Zealand in 2005, was nicknamed 'Mad Dog' during his sports career, in recognition of his brave, unwavering style to the game.
He competed through a bone injury of his leg for a duration with Leicester and once sparked a training-ground altercation with fellow player and friend Martin Johnson when, irritated, he abandoned a tackle pad and commenced throwing himself into collisions.
After appearing as a replacement in the Rugby World Cup championship win over Australia in 2003, he claimed a ball at the back of the set piece in the crucial phase of play, setting a platform for half-back Matt Dawson to advance and Jonny Wilkinson to score the match-winning field goal.
Assistance Community
Moody has earlier informed Johnson, who skippered England to that title, and a couple of other ex- team-mates about his condition, but the rest will be learning his news with the remainder of public.
"We'll have a period when we'll need to depend on their support but, at the moment, just having that sort of affection and acceptance that people are there is what's important," he commented.
"Rugby is such a great community.
"I mentioned to the kids the other day, I've had an incredible life.
"Even should it concluded now, I've enjoyed all of it and welcomed all of it and got to do it with remarkable people.
"When you get to call your passion your vocation, it's one of the greatest honors.
"To have done it for so long a period with the squads that I did it with was a joy. And I know they will want to help in whatever way they can and I anticipate having those conversations."
